ACLU's Ten Commandments for Court and School
1. Believe in anything that makes you feel good.
2. Forget God's commands. Do what the judge tells you to do.
3. Your choice of words is your business. Four letter words are shorter, so cuss away!
4. If you have to work every day of the week, no problem. You can sleep at night.
5. You are only the product of sex, anyhow -- so, let your parents fend for themselves.
6. If you hurt somebody, do it so you don't get caught. If you are arrested, though, we will find an excuse in your childhood to shorten your stay in prison.
7. As long as its consensual, anything goes. Our county government gets money from Washington to take care of the babies you make, or there's always abortion.
8. In the end, all property belongs to the government. You have as much right to use it as the next person. Just take it secretly, and everything will be okay. Try not to get caught, though. Our criminal calendars are overloaded.
9. When you go to court, say what the judge wants to hear.
10. Make sure your neighbor keeps his hands off your stuff, but don't use a gun in the process.
1. Exodus 20:3: "Thou shalt have no other gods before me." Exodus 20:3
2. Exodus 20: “Thou shalt not make unto thee any graven image. . .:5 Thou shalt not bow down thyself to them, nor serve them:. . .keep my commandments.”
3. Exodus 20:7: "Thou shalt not take the name of the LORD thy God in vain."
4. Exodus 20:8: "Remember the Sabbath day, to keep it holy."
5. Exodus 20:12: "Honour thy father and thy mother: that thy days may be long upon the land which the LORD thy God giveth thee."
6. Exodus 20:13: "Thou shalt not kill."
7. Exodus 20:14: "Thou shalt not commit adultery."
8. Exodus 20:15: "Thou shalt not steal."
9. Exodus 20:16: "Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbour."
10. Exodus 20:17: "Thou shalt not covet thy neighbour's house, thou shalt not covet thy neighbour's wife, nor his manservant, nor his maidservant, nor his ox, nor his ass, nor any thing that is thy neighbour's."